Let's be honest, we do whine when we have a significant other AND we do whine when don't. There is no stopping it. Relationships will be good and bad, happy and sad, stressful and relieving. You can't just have Yin and not have Yang. The , "point I am trying to make is, you have to deal with the bad in order to get the good. If relationships were all easy, divorce rates would diminish, there would be no funny relationship Vines, and we'd all have someone by the age of 27.
Relationships are not perfect. But, before I get too deep into this, let me just tell you a few things that are on my mind.
1. People seem to tell me whenever I have a break up, "You have to love yourself before you love another" or "Take a break! What's the rush of having someone?" Ok. First off, if I didn't love myself, I wouldn't be trying for a relationship. BUT, I'll be honest, some men/women really need to follow this advice. A man/women you just meet will not replace the happiness you don't have. If you're unhappy with yourself or your lifestyle, don't just go on and hook up with the first person that says a wonderful opinion about you. You have to figure yourself out first before figuring out someone else.
2. "TAKE A BREAK": I disagree with this, but there is a reason. After a break-up, I usually have that week or two where I'm relieved to be out of it (so far, I have been the one ending things). But, then I start feeling like maybe I should get back with that person, maybe I was too harsh, maybe we can work things out. But then, my brain says boisterously, "NO, you broke up with him for a reason!" For me, the way I move forward is finding someone else. It's weird, but that is how I am and that is PERFECTLY ok. Everyone is going to be different. You can either stay single for as long as you want or you can date. No judgement should ever be passed on you for that. It took me a while to actually feel this way, but it's the truth.
3. "I'm single because...": I am so sick of seeing those posts about "why I'm not in a relationship" or "10 reasons why I am single". Just stop, you're making a fool out of mainly women who are single and don't feel that way. The reason why you're single is not because you aren't "social" or you find your "friends are your soul mates", it's because you're CHOOSING TO BE SINGLE. Women, come on, you ignore the guys that are trying to get with you because you're looking for a damn Hugh Jackman. I'm not going to lie, that's been me a few times, we all have preferences. But, let's not get superstar crazy. Stop looking for the guys who are going to spoil you with goodies or the ones who are completely infatuated with you and shower you with compliments. If you are looking, look for someone who will make you happy, who has some similar interests, who will make you laugh and smile even when they say something that isn't really funny. If you're adventurous, don't go for the guy who just likes sitting around and doesn't like to sweat in the sun. Just...sayin!
Continuing on...
One thing that goes through everyone's mind, and don't say you haven't thought about it, is "Should I go looking for him/her? Or should I wait for them to show up?" Coincidence or fate, looking or waiting: both are fine. If you are a go getter and you want to go and find the one, you go Glen Coco! You're awesome for having the courage to go talk to that cute guy at the bar or to that girl that all the guys want. Waiting is just as good. Maybe you're really tired of looking for "the one" and just decide to go with the flow. Whether you choose to wait or go looking, it's your choice. Like I continuously say in this post, EVERYONE is different.
Lastly, let's be honest, we all want the Jon Hamm or Dave Franco man in our life. And for men, the Scarlett Johansson or Anne Hathaway. But, realistically, there isn't a huge chance we'll get that lucky. But looks are not everything. Okay, before you attack me, I do look for a good looking fellow before I get to know them. But if their personality is a stinker, then I usually back off immediately. Looks cannot make up for a sleaze. Personality is always a winner for me. If you're funny, adventurous, can hold a conversation, LOVE coffee, and are an all around good person, come at me! Don't ever look at movies or disney princesses and compare your love life to that. It's unrealistic, although it's fun to think that maybe you'll meet an Aladdin or have a cheesy Notebook running-in-the-rain moment.
But this is my short post about what I think about for relationships. For me, I'm happy being single. I'm up for dating, but school and graduating are my number one priorities. Big tip for you ladies, if your man is doing all the work in the relationship and you cannot keep up with it: End It or Fix It. Relationships work both ways and it's unfair when one person is making all the effort and you're just a sitting duck. And that works for you men too!
Hope everyone has a wonderful day! :)
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